How memory works.
February 27th, 2013
I spent forty minutes on the phone this evening with two friends, now a married couple, who I hadn’t spoken with in forty years. Paul Grissom and Ann Waldmann. I forgot to ask if they are the Grissoms, the Waldmanns, the Grissom-Waldmanns, the Waldmann-Grissoms, Ray, Jay, or You-can-call-me-RayJay. Who owns who, these days?
I have not seen either of them (nor a reasonable FaceBook facsimile) in forty years, yet a clear reproduction exists. But you’d have to be me to see it. That’s the weird thing about memory — I will see Paul and Ann in my mind long after I will remember their names. Much of our phone call was spent, “You know who I mean, the blond gal…” and “the reddish-haired woman who played the office manager. Why it was shot right in your hometown of Toronto…” and “…can’t remember his name, but I can picture his mustache and his name-tag. David E. Davis, it was.”
It turns out we got in touch because Ann came across my name on Google, skipped over to my blog, and read much of my recent biography. One thing I told them about — just so they can one-up you — Is the heart attack I had two weeks ago. No not the one I had in late October. The one I had two weeks ago. So that I don’t forget it, I will now write it out, beat for skipped beat: 1 a.m., Friday, October 14. Woke up, blinding pain. This time I had my nitroglycerin on my nightstand. Took two pills, relieved the pain, went back to sleep. (Should have gotten up, gotten dressed, and left for the hospital). 3 a.m. Awoke to pain. Took one or two pills. Went back to sleep (Should have gotten up, etc…) 4 a.m. Awoke to fairly bright light in my eyes. I was sitting, naked, in the living room chair. Found my way back to my bedroom, took two pills, got dressed. Knocked on roommate’s door. Discussed pros and cons, ambulance vs cab. Chose, wisely (it’s another story) the cab. Went to the VA hospital and walked out two days later, 1 and 1/2 stents heavier. And I am fine now.
It’s midnight in Toronto. Paul and Ann are, I hope, in bed by now. But I can’t picture them because I failed to have them describe their bedroom. Oh, I can picture them easily enough, cuddled up on one of the fourth floor couches at Campbell-Ewald Advertising, in the GM building in Detroit. But they’d still be in their twenties. Canada in their future, San Francisco in mine.
February 27th, 2013 at 10:51 pm
Wasn’t expecting this segment to be as serious as, say, a heart attack. Very happy you’re OK, Fred.
February 28th, 2013 at 11:29 am
Thanks, Chuck
February 28th, 2013 at 9:01 pm
It was a real pleasure to reconnect with you, Fred. Sorry we didn’t get around to describing our bedroom, but be assured it’s a very happy place. It runs the full width of our Beaches home in Toronto; it’s minimally furnished with a very posh and expensive mattress – the sort that bury you in luxury at four star B&Bs; it has an elaborate scandinavian-victorian head board carved in pale pine mounted on the wall. The walls are painted a soft, herbal green and a few simple works of art from old friends are placed about. There’s a bounty of pillows and a big fluffy duvet. Two windows overlook our leafy street. There’s a reading lamp on either side of the bed, night stands piled with books and magazines and one wicker chair that is never sat upon. It’s there to welcome you into the room and hold the big pillows that look real good during the day but need a place to rest when we sleep. We have a twice daily ritual of making the bed and bedroom camera ready in case the House and Garden photographers come by, and sleep ready for the two of us and Tucker the black and white cat.
The rest I will leave to your fertile imagination, bearing in mind we are still very happy and very much in love after some 35 years together.
Please be smarter about your heart attacks in the future, better still don’t have any; but if you do, then do as you must to keep writing your wonderful stuff. We love it.
Cheers, Paul
March 1st, 2013 at 3:22 pm
Happy you’re okay, too, but why did the entry say Oct. 14? I’m confused. Just e-mailed you a NYTimes article about Jay Dafeo. Stay healthy!
March 5th, 2013 at 11:18 am
David E. Davis — Founder/Editor of ‘Automobile’ magazine.
Whoa … another heart attack. Freddie, you’re too old for those things !!! Glad you’re on the mend and writing.
March 12th, 2013 at 1:09 pm
Hi Fred,
I landed on your blog a while back, when this post was at the top. HOW ODD but in a good way. It’s been a loooooooooooooooong time since we represented your paintings. Looks like you’ve had some medical setbacks but otherwise you’re thriving.
Feel free to visit my own blog, which I haven’t updated in years. You can still catch up somewhat though. A goal for 2013: get back to blogging.