It’s a shame Subway didn’t apologize immediately for their eleven inch sandwich. But there is so much lying in that industry. Most Subway sandwich stations are not on the subway lines. The few that are easily accessible do not guarantee that the subway that comes will allow you to eat your sandwich while riding. Toothpicks are often nonexistent at the shops, unless you order a sandwich that comes with a toothpick poked through it. The only thing you can be reasonably certain of is that the ice in your Coca-Cola is 32% or less.

The same thing is true at Toys-R-Us. Check the Hot Wheels. Not very hot are they? BabyBlade Metal Fusion Battle Top-Burn Fireblaze launches tops into battle with its RipCord technology, but does not make mention that ripcords are cords that essentially “rip” a parachute backpack open, and that calling a cord that imparts spin to a top a “ripcord” is to take the term lightly, indeed. And the Banzai SpeedZone Racing WaterSlide cannot be used for racing because it is too narrow for one child to overtake another. In addition, the internal capitalizations (i.e. Z in SpeedZone and S in WaterSlide) while not illegal, are just plain silly.

For a true “Apology needed” sales claim, look no farther than your nearby Bandolino shoe store for ladies. A review appeared in an ad for the Celitta model,  “Despite being petite, I have wider calves. It’s difficult to find boots that fit. Apparently, if you don’t have stick-thin legs, you have trouble.” The testimonial was signed by April Wansauke. April Wansauke is a man who appears in various clubs as a drag queen. Yes, his/her calves are wider than the female norm. It is “Adam” Wansauke, I am willing to bet, to whom the check is made out.

Yes, Subway sandwich lovers, it is shocking the amount of misrepresentation we must live with. But, as you can see, an eleven inch “footlong” is not the worst swindle a consumer must confront.