Dear Occupants.

October 7th, 2011

Dig through your closets, guys, and find your old blow-up sex dolls. Dress them up in gray wigs. Desexualize them with granny dresses. Take them to your Wall Street protests. They will represent your grandmother who’d like to be out there with you, but is bent with age.

Find a wheelchair, a gurney, or a simple wagon and stuff an old leisure suit with straw. Let that be your dad or your grandpa. Us old folks, handicapped or otherwise incapacitated, would like to be represented. The more space the protests occupy, the better.

Cobble up some effigies. Why not a pumpkin-head banker on a stick. Put a big cigar in his mouth for effect. Then foreclose on him. Bust the thick orange head with bats until the pulp falls out. Like at a child’s birthday party.

I know, I know, peaceful demonstrations, so the have-nothings can be spoken of respectfully by the bought media. Is Amanda Knox a bigger story than this? No. Michael Jackson’s doctor’s trial? No. This is front page news. Right up there with Steve Jobs — one of the few rich men who earned his money giving the world something useful.

Tom Wolfe archly named the bankers “Masters of the Universe.” It was satire, but the sociopathic ego is untouched by satire. “Yes, of course we are the Masters. Thank you Tom, whoever you are.” That was in the 80s and things have only gotten worse. As a student of the Third Reich, Master has a familiar ring. Would a Rick Perry enjoy adding three or four zeros to his 234? I don’t know. I don’t want America to find out.

We as a nation have been led to believe that we can be as rich as our masters — that’s why we didn’t bring these bullshitters down when Reaganism was taking hold. 100 million people believe that Christ will lift them up to heaven if they behave and do as their wealthy churches tell them. Nope, their money’s already been raptured up to the penthouses. But they’ll never join it.

My sincere thanks to the Occupy Wall Street protesters. Please keep it going. I hope to join you soon.

5 Responses to “Dear Occupants.”

  1. wendy beck Says:

    Thanks, Fred. They keep trivializing the protesters as being young, unemployed — as if most older or employed folks can get out there. I went last night. Maybe it’s time for me to drag out my “Chumps for ^real Change” manifesto!

  2. fwickham Says:

    Wendy –

    By all means, present your manifesto.

  3. Scott Keck Says:

    A comment on FB about these protests:

    I hope the protesters enjoy tweeting and posting to FB about their protest on the totally-outsourced, Chinese made smartphones they can all apparently afford.

    I’m just sayin….

  4. Michael Benzon Says:

    Herman Caine says the occupy Wall
    Street movement is “anti-capitalism.’ He’s wrong. They are not anti-capitalism, they are anti-crook. Big difference.

  5. jon Says:

    Everyone needs to see Inside Job. It will make you cringe that these scumbags are not in jail. Obama’s gov is a Wall Street government. Nothing will happen on his watch.

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