I don’t know how long I’ll be away from the blog. What’s the average stay in the hospital for an amputation? Does it vary according to whether it’s above or below the knee? Since I don’t yet know where they’re cutting, it’s hard to guess, but I’m going to say it may be as short as seven days or as long as eight & one-half weeks.

After the hospital stay, I suppose I’ll go to some kind of inpatient physical therapy facility. But I’m not certain of that, either.

I’m not a laptop user, and even if I were I doubt if I’d write much. I just spent six weeks in the hospital and didn’t even read. I merely stared at bad TV, which I somehow managed to enjoy.

What I’m getting at is the only way I can think to let readers know how I’m doing is to invite those who keep in touch with me to submit comments to this particular post. People can just scroll down the comments section to read the very latest Fredline News. Think of it as team blogging.

I’m not a great one for visitors, but I like phone calls. (I tend to keep them short, so don’t be offended if I say, “Gotta go, the doctors just walked into the room with a laryngoscope,” even if you’re certain I’m bullshitting).

The San Francisco VA’s phone # is 415-221-4810. From there it’s a mild purgatory of talking to one or more operators, waiting, unnameable electronic tones, and lite rock.* Eventually, my phone will ring and if I am nearby, I will answer. There is no voicemail.

So, how’s that for a deal? You report on me in the comments section and when I get back to the blog I’ll write something very special just for you (or for one of your clients).

*Here’s my idea. Instead of hold music, there should be hold comedy. A bunch of comedians are commissioned to do routines about the experience of being on hold. If the party answers before the caller hears the punchline, it’s a mixed blessing.